One of the worst feelings is when you feel, “NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME.“
It is a terrible emotion, and one of the leading causes of depression as it instills a feeling of vulnerability in you. It damages your self-confidence, which acts as the biggest hurdle for you to succeed in today’s world because confidence is the real game-changer at present times!
What Will I Learn?
- 1 5 Reasons Why You Feel that “No One Understands Me”
- 1.1 1. You have an intimacy Phobia
- 1.2 2. You have a Fear of Being Judged – No One Understands Me is a Judgement as Well!
- 1.3 3. You Have Trust Issues – This is “Why No One Understands Me”
- 1.4 4. You Thrive Over Mutual Dependency
- 1.5 5. Lack of Authentic Communication – ‘No One Understands Me’ is Never Told!
- 2 How Not to Feel “No One Understands Me” – 10 Ways To Try Right Now
- 2.1 1. Communicate Openly
- 2.2 2. Let your body do the Talking!
- 2.3 3. Have a Mindful Perspective – Is “No One Understands Me” Real?
- 2.4 4. Delve into Introspection – Why No One Understands Me?
- 2.5 5. Stop Feeling the Victim of Your Mentality
- 2.6 6. Look on the Positive Side of the People
- 2.7 7. Exude Confidence to Everyone Around You
- 2.8 8. “Seek First to Understand”
- 2.9 9. Stop Considering Yourself as an Alien
- 2.10 10. Work on Your Self-Esteem
- 3 Conclusion:
- Intrapersonal Skills & Intelligence – The Ultimate Guide 2019
- Ultimate Guide on ‘How to Tell Someone’ in 2019 – Love, Like & More
- How to Overcome Codependency – 7 Effective Steps to Apply Now in 2019
5 Reasons Why You Feel that “No One Understands Me”
1. You have an intimacy Phobia
Many socially adept people are intimacy phobic. This means that even if you are friendly and outgoing and still afraid of intimacy, then this might be an obstacle for people in getting to know you. Not letting people close to you then expecting them to understand you doesn’t work.
It’s like expecting someone to cook you a meal but not letting them within ten feet of the stove. So you should work on this trait of yours and try being comfortable around people.
2. You have a Fear of Being Judged – No One Understands Me is a Judgement as Well!
The fear of being judged is a common trait element in human beings. Everyone has gone through this fear once in a while. Many of us keep going through the fear of being judged almost all the time.
Therefore, as an adult, you are afraid to share things about you with people because you think they will judge you. This can be a result of having critical parents or teachers and having a troubled childhood.
3. You Have Trust Issues – This is “Why No One Understands Me”
Trust issues are a result of the developmental problems of the mind. For instance, it can spring out if you had, you could not trust adults in your childhood who were supposed to be your guardians.
The inability to trust also incurs after a physical to emotional abuse.
You will have a constant feeling of “no one understands me” if you have had a hard time trusting everyone. It is not a guarantee that you will not find people who will break it. But it does not mean to keep yourself locked in because you did not have a good experience in trusting someone. The world is still a better place to take chances.
4. You Thrive Over Mutual Dependency
In a relationship or a friendship, you will find yourself changing your hobbies and interests to match the other person. That is because you have a problem of being codependent.
Codependency is an addiction to seeking approval and validation from others to the point you can lose sight of who you are.
For instance, if I change all my hobbies and opt for new which match my friend, I will be her carbon copy from the exterior. But internally, I will not be feeling the happiness in doing all these things. Moreover, I would feel why no one understands me or why does she fail to look inside me.
Therefore, always remember to claim your unique personality because everyone is different and special in his way.
5. Lack of Authentic Communication – ‘No One Understands Me’ is Never Told!
If “no one understands me” is becoming a daily issue, then the chances are that I might be having a problem! This problem can only be a lack of communication.
Similarly, if you will not communicate with people, then how do you expect them to know you or even understand you? You need to break free and open up to people to be recognized in the best way.
These reasons are a part of our daily lives, but we don’t see them because of their seemingly meager importance. So, the question arises on how to make people understand you? The following are the ten effective ways to adapt.
How Not to Feel “No One Understands Me” – 10 Ways To Try Right Now
1. Communicate Openly
Communication is the key! As mentioned above, you need to learn to communicate effectively with people. If you are having a problem, then read books on developing interpersonal and intrapersonal skills to communicate.
Without communication, we will be half dead.
The need to talk is eminent in human beings, and it must be satisfied, or else, it results in psychological issues. Learn to communicate with your words in clarity. If you will be clear about what you want to say, that means you are one step ahead of your game.
Therefore, interact with people because it is natural. If you are successful in connecting with everyone around you, you won’t be having the feeling of “nobody understands me” ever again!
2. Let your body do the Talking!
Communication is not limited to the words. Gestures and the whole body language can do a lot of talking. Try relaxing your shoulders while you are talking with someone. It gives the other person the message of being open and comfortable.
Smile softly and include friendly, demonstration gestures in your conversations, and you are all set to change the game of, “no one understands me,” with a bang!
3. Have a Mindful Perspective – Is “No One Understands Me” Real?
Change the perspective which has the thought of, “no one understands me.” If this thought looms over you, then exclude it immediately from your mind. Take a few deep breaths, perhaps even try a 2-minute breathing exercise.
It is just like excluding all the negativity in Yoga. Empty your mind and form a perspective of positivity. This will help you in living a stress-free life.
4. Delve into Introspection – Why No One Understands Me?
Become your critic and your own detective. Analyze what are the underlying factors which lead no one to understand you.
The more you understand yourself, the more clearly you present yourself to others, the more they can understand you. Make a list of our likes and dislikes and seek the best in you.
Communicate your best self to the world effectively, and you won’t be thinking, “why no one understands me,” again.
5. Stop Feeling the Victim of Your Mentality
Stop feeling the victim of self-pity and other issues you have due to the nagging thought of “why nobody understands me.” Work on yourself and tell your viewpoints to the people.
Never let the aura of misunderstanding become your identity. The only solution is to communicate effectively with people. Voice your opinions and don’t live to please others.
6. Look on the Positive Side of the People
Learn to see the good in people. I am not saying that people will always understand you. They might not, and you will be left with feeling miserable again. But focus on what they are giving to you.
They might be answering you effectively or catering to your needs, even if they might not “get you.” You need to have a positive outlook on things. If you are consistent in communicating, then eventually the world will understand you.
7. Exude Confidence to Everyone Around You
Make people realize that they are on our team. It will help you to build your social circle and other intimate circles. It is easy for people to resent someone when they see other people get successful.
If you connect with them, then they will end up caring up for you.
Once they know that you have pure intentions, they will stand up with you rather than stand against you. You must exude confidence, which shows that you are an able human being, and you have a positive attitude towards life.
8. “Seek First to Understand”
If you want people to understand you, then try following them first. It will be a massive breakthrough for you in knowing people and getting to know their behavior dynamics.
It will allow you to compare, to analyze your personality with other people.
The condition is that the analysis should be healthy enough to make you see the differences. Take a good look at all your listening and speaking skills and apply all the corrections practically. You will spot a difference.
9. Stop Considering Yourself as an Alien
Stop thinking that you are weird or any different from the people around you. Remember, every other person is going through psychological warfare. The best advice is to give people space and give yourself some space too.
Every person is unique, and so are you.
Carve out your talents and work on them. Make them your identity and a unique element of your personality. To have confidence that you are different but equally healthy will allow you t mingle with people very quickly
10. Work on Your Self-Esteem
Self-esteem, as you know, is the most crucial factor which defines self-achievement. Make it a point to notice and challenge the internal pundit in your mind. Start seeing the beneficial things about yourself.
Furthermore, when somebody offers you a compliment, don’t get over it, acknowledge it. There are numerous incredible books on self-help too so that some reading can help you big time.
Looking around and asking for help is not an alien concept now. It proves to be beneficial if you consult a therapist in your difficult phases of life.
If you think that you’re on the wrong path, don’t be afraid to turn around and start again.
In the end, what matters most are the things that you’ve learned on your journey. Don’t count your failures. Make each failure count by using them as the foundation for your stronger self. All these tips will surely not make you think the thought of “no one understands me” again.